As parents, we wish to have influence with our children. We wish for cooperation. We want our children to follow directions and accept guidance. Yet, how often do we take the opposite path to get there? We insist on control and demand obedience from our children. We speak of battles and power. We shush emotions…
Positive Parenting: Why Keeping Our Limits When Children Become Upset is Important
When we let go of punitive parenting and authority over the child style of parenting, setting a limit with kindness and consistency and then actually holding it may at first feel similar to punishing or being authoritarian. With time and practice though, it is possible to be confident, calm and consistent in a way that conveys that the limits are about creating safety, building trust and guidance.
An Alternative Option to Pre-school for Future Home Educators
Be it digging with a stick in a muddy field, searching for crabs in rock pools, running through grass or splashing in puddles, he will find something to occupy himself and spark his interest. When at home he has free rein to go in the garden whenever he pleases, and he loves to potter about in this tiny space full of interesting nooks and crannies to explore.
Positive Parenting: Rethinking “You Have To Share That!”
Sharing requires understanding of another person’s feelings and desires. Sharing is about being creative with another as you use something together, it is about being compassionate and giving, it is about being respectful. How do our young one’s grow into the sharing mode? By our understanding of THEIR feelings and desires, our compassion, our giving, our being respectful of them. It also begins with complete ownership over something.
Why Skipping a Nap Results in Meltdown
Over time, as a baby’s sleep cycle matures he will be able to go longer periods between sleeps. It is not until age 4 or 5 that a child is able to go happily through the entire day without a nap, and sleep research suggests that even through adulthood a mid-day nap or rest break is extremely beneficial in reducing the pressure in all human beings.
The Words to Say When Children are Disappointed
Finding the right words when children are disappointed isn’t always easy. I’ve learned over the years that although it is hard to see our children feeling upset, distracting, reasoning, lecturing or otherwise trying to fix their feelings usually just backfires. So how do we find the right words to say when children are disappointed? The words that express…
Parenting: What Triggers your Anger?
Family life is complicated and unpredictable. Day-to-day expectations and responsibilities can create angry emotions in both parents and children. No matter how skilled you are at parenting, no matter how wonderful your children are, you cannot eliminate or avoid the unpleasant situations that occur in all families. However, once you understand where the anger comes from you can modify the situation and learn ways to control your reactions, so that anger can occupy a smaller place in your home.
Are Natural Consequences A Good Discipline Choice?
Natural Consequences are often talked about as the go-to gentle alternative to punitive actions like time-outs or removing privileges. Using natural consequences can, in fact, be an excellent parenting tool, but sometimes resorting to natural consequences may be ineffective and downright dangerous. When used properly, children can learn a lot from natural consequences, however…
Beyond Obedience: The Importance of Fostering Cooperation at Home
Getting children to cooperate and listen is probably the most shared concern I hear from parents. Similar themes repeat themselves, over and over.
“How do I get my kids to do their homework?”
“How do I get my kids to listen to me? I’m so tired of yelling…for nothing…it makes no difference!”
Our job as parents can be tough as the balancing act of encouraging cooperation positively and needing to get things done unfolds each day. Let’s be honest, what we want and what our children want are often out of synch. It’s easy, alright, a lot easier when everyone is smiling, cooperating and listening. Fostering cooperation reduces the need to yell, nag and demand.
Our Job as Parents isn’t to Get it Right Every Single Time
No matter how good you get at calming yourself, being mindful, being positive and working towards harmony and cooperation, there will be moments where you will feel overwhelmed or not sure how to “handle it”. Our job as parents isn’t to get it right every single time, our job is to be there, trying, getting…
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